Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

An Extreme Drop in Oxygen Will Eventually Suffocate Most Life on Earth - ScienceAlert

I was tired of trying and failing.

I had run out of hope.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

New Study Finds 1 Promising Way To Keep Colon Cancer From Returning - HuffPost

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

The sadness was still there.

What are the popular niches to talk about as a content creator on the social media platform?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

Billy Joel attempted suicide twice and fell into coma after affair with friend's wife - KOMO

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

It’s here now, writing to you.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

If You Deal With Pain From Sciatica, An Expert Says These Products May Help - HuffPost

Be who you already are.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Neuroscientists just discovered a fascinating fact about the grooves in your brain - PsyPost

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

Oldest depiction of the Milky Way galaxy discovered in an Egyptian sarcophagus - Earth.com

I was tired of fighting.

And the sadness?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

Why are women attracted to ugly guys?

It’s still here.

You are like me, then.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

How could NASA possibly land on the moon when it's impossible to reach the moon through the Earth's dome? Why are they making up such an obvious lie?

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.